In the middle of the night last night I felt very close to death. I can't explain it, I just felt that way. The sad thing is that I feel sad that I DIDN'T die! I know this sounds like a poor little me speech, but it's just that life is just not worth it to me anymore.
The constant pain, living in this rat hole, and having to worry where my next meal is coming from, is just too much for me to deal with. I think Patrick Swaze said it best when he said that you just have to keep fighting unless you get too tired, and that's how I feel, I'm just too tired.
To All Of You
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